Little Professor Calc for Android

…with a REAL computer inside!

Before the Speak 'n' Spell, which became an official 80s icon by its inclusion in the movie E.T., there was the Little Professor Calculator that was invented by one-time computing powerhouse, Texas Instruments, in order to finally bring a happier, friendly face to the blood-sucking horror that is modern mathematics. Oh I know that math has brought us countless innovations from toasters that enhance our breakfasts to the latest and greatest supercomputers that spend all day planning military strategies, but let's face it, most kids find it pretty boring. Luckily for rich Western children, TI introduced this educational calculator dressed up as a cartoon professor back in 1976, which was born from the (then) dream that through the use of technology, the human condition could be improved upon and utopia would finally be within mankind's reach. So people started cramming microchips into everything they could get their hands on and now here we are today.
Aside from the kiddy artwork that adorned the casing, the Little Professor was a fairly standard calculator except that it also functioned as a basic quiz game, randomly generating simple equations to which the operator would presumably input the correct answer, resulting in hours and hours of fun and learning. For example: 6 x 9 = ? And the answer is 42. "ERROR!" The Professor would then shame you with stark computer-speak displayed on its LED screen and then give you another chance to enter the correct answer. At the end of a round of questions you got to see your total score which let you know if you were going to be a Humanities student or not.
For those of you old enough to remember this little gem and who perhaps would enjoy sharing childhood memories with your own modern iPad/Netflix electro-children of the 21st century, you can now pick up an app-ified version for your Android device from the Google Play store and (as far as I can tell) it's free. Check out the video demo below and then click the link to visit Google Play and pick it up. Enjoy!

THE LITTLE PROFESSOR CALCULATOR APP FOR ANDROID

Not Your Father's Action Figures

In 1978 a little toy company called Kenner began selling a line of action figures based on one of the biggest box office hits of the time, known then simply as Star Wars. At the time, the figures represented the state of the art in miniatures featuring movable limbs and heads and boasted an arsenal of tiny little blasters and light-sabers available for waging intragalactic war. In time, other action figures from competing toy franchises eventually hit the scene, such as G.I. Joe,  which featured more points of articulation, more artistic detail and better "extras," however, because they were ultimately being sold as children's toys, the craftsmanship of most 1980s action figures was not up to the calibur demanded by serious collectors (read: kids that never grew up). Now, current Star Wars toy licensee, Hasbro, has decided to answer that market demand with the introduction of its new Star Wars: The Black Series six-inch scale action figures.

Then and now

Slightly larger than their distant Kenner cousins, the Black Series figures feature top-notch sculpting and detailing, previously unavailable to the Star Wars toy market, along with expertly crafted accessories that match their movie counterparts perfectly. Finally you can recreate your favorite scenes from the Star Wars films without having to squint to make Luke look less like a generic toy as the Black Series figures look as much like the actors who portrayed them on screen as is physically possible on such a small scale. While the original Kenner series action figures cost anywhere from $1.50 to five dollars, and the current line of Star Wars dudes chime in at about nine bucks each, the Black Series will set you back a whopping $20 per figure. Hasbro is said to be showing off the new line at the massive annual TIA Toy Fair in New York this weekend. Let's keep our fingers crossed and wallets at the ready!

Turn Your Phone Into an Arcade

Gaming just got a whole lot itty-bittier with the iCade Jr. from Ion Audio. Just plug in your iPhone or iPod touch and fire up one of the many compatible games from the App Store for a devilishly diminutive retro experience. Featuring a solid arcade-style joystick and eight action buttons (four on the front and four on the back) the iCade Jr. also sports a pass-thru port for use with a USB cable, turning your mini-arcade into the coolest iPhone dock ever. Best of all, it's made to work perfectly with the "Atari's Greatest Hits" app which features 100 classic home and arcade titles from the number one video game maker of the 1980s. But be warned, this little fella costs $69.99, so for 30 bucks more you could pick up its iPad-compatible sibling, the original iCade, instead.

CLICK HERE TO GO TO THE ICADE JR. PRODUCT PAGE

Learn to Spell While Phoning Home

Way back in ye olden days of yore, my great-great-great-great-great-great-grandpa had to learn his ABCs from what they called a horn-book or crib book, which was basically a bare ping-pong paddle with the alphabet scrawled onto it using a burnt stick or something. While the benefits of having a learning tool around with which you could play a quick round of table-tennis during recess were obvious, humankind soon discovered that a static display and lack of digital sound were keeping future generations from reaching their true academic potentials. Thus, in 1978, the brilliant engineers at Texas Instruments, known for their pioneering work in transistors and integrated circuits, decided to bestow upon us mere mortals, not unlike Moses at Mount Sinai, an electronic tablet. No it wasn't an iPad. It was called Speak & Spell and it was frakking awesome. Designed for children to assist them in learning how to literally speak and spell, the brightly-colored portable battery-murderer was the first device of its kind to feature true digital speech synthesis and not just human voices recorded on tape like the earlier See 'n' Say line from Mattel. While sales of the Speak & Spell were consistently brisk due to its innovative and engaging style of learning-through-playing, the device truly became a monster-seller after its inclusion into the plot of Steven Spielberg's 1982 classic, E.T. Thanks to modern technology, you can re-experience the thrill of spelling "boobies" on one of these machines by going HERE and trying out science teacher Kevin St. Onge's home-brewed Speak & Spell simulator featuring authentic retro sights and sounds! Make sure you've got Flash! (hint: press the "on" button to get the simulator started)

I Wear My 8-Bit Sunglasses At Night

These are awesome. What more can I say? They don't light up, they don't check your email, they just sit on your face and look cool. They cost less than $10 so you can buy all of your friends one – wait for it – unless you're still reading this post in which case you probably don't have any...friends, that is (cue the crickets). They also come in a version with clear lenses in case you want to, oh hell I don't know, pretend you're Clark Kent while playing Superman on the Atari 2600 maybe?